TPL
Nakorn Ratchasima 0-0 Chonburi
80th Birthday Stadium
Attendance: 13,260
Sunday 24th April, 2016
Match Report
by Peter Reeves
So a slightly different approach to the match report this week. Every week I bang on about the lack of defensive capability and understanding, the ‘D’ word, but I’ve decided there is no point bringing it up. They can’t, won’t or just will not bothered to make any improvements to let’s leave them to it.
Let’s talk about the ‘football experience’ instead. Matchday. A group of us had planned to meet up at a coffee shop on the approach road to the stadium but I inadvertently met up with Russ adorned in his Swatcat shirt. I in my Ajax club shirt, at a 7-11 (as you do) on my way there. We travelled the short distance down, him jousting with the traffic on his motor bike and me in the relative safety of four wheels. There’s the coffee shop…shut. Oh dear. Never mind, drinks place next door and we ensconced ourselves outside waiting for the webmaster to show up.
We had arrived at 3pm and I checked the kick off time on the banner poster on the way in to make sure the marketing people at Swatcat hadn’t cocked it up again and changed the kick off time, but no 6pm, so good. Fans already beginning to drift around. Various topics of football conversation evolved as Russ and I immersed ourselves in the ‘matchday’ experience. Memories of former days returned as we discussed and agreed on many issues as we baked in the sun.
Russ made the comment that the lack of a certain issue (the ‘D’word we are not going to mention) will cause the downfall of the national team because they haven’t got one either, and we talked about the impending hammerings they might get in the next group stage which can only be a good thing because then someone might actually wake up. (Doubt it). Talked about the wonderful performances of the Thai teams in the ACL and how the gap is widening not closing as some would have us believe. We discussed the new ‘police infiltrated’ leadership and the quality or lack of it on show every week here. Some over-rated foreign imports and the lack of ‘quality’ of most of the Thai players.
At 3.30pm, the Chonburi team bus enters the stadium. Excitement goes up a notch, followed by half a dozen pick up tracks crammed with Swatcat fans flying flags the size of the club owners ego’s, drums, horns and anything else that would make a noise. They really are great supporters. Our discussions continued and the webmaster arrived, straight from a wedding he was attending next to the stadium. Now we are talking football, punk rock and a few beers, water and Sprites washed down a variety of issues. A ‘boys’ day at the football. I’d missed this.
People are beginning to arrive and a pick up with about 12 Chonburi fans hanging from every corner, leaning tragically to one side and looking like it was about to expire and die on the side of the road, with their flags etc, age range about 6 years upwards goes by. Surely they hadn’t come all that way in that! Probably. 4.15 the Swatcat bus arrived. A little late in my view. Probably detained by their pre-match Som Tum. As we all know, an essential pre-match meal for the professional player.
The talk continued. Wolves, England, Holland, Oldham Athletic, The UK leaving the EU, Millwall fans. The webmaster’s wife arrived by taxi and as it is now 4.40 I go off to pick up ‘er indoors’, a Swatcat fan. We arrive back and the talk continues with the girls making an attempt to contribute but not really understanding the ‘walk of death’ for away fans into Millwall’s old Den stadium, they hardly can be expected to understand what that felt like.
I go off to the stadium with my other half and to join the Chonburi fans, Russ goes off to join the expected, we thought, 17,000 (attendance actually 13,000) orange clad fans and lead the ‘Nakhon Ratchasima massif’ in song and the webmaster and his wife go back to the wedding they had slipped out of to meet us later.
I get my tickets. 200 bloody baht each for away fans and meet up with Brian and we talk more football sitting with a few hundred ‘blues’ outside the ground. 5.30 in we go. Brian said if I take the top off my water bottle they will let me in with it, but if I leave it on they will take it away from me. What?? He was right. I’m still trying to work out the logic of that one but it is Thailand isn’t it.
Had my bottom fondled by an enthusiastic security guard, a male one unfortunately, to make sure I wasn’t carrying any explosives and as my other half went through I gave him a look that said if you do that to her I shall insert your medals up a well know orifice. She was allowed straight through. Got my stamp to say I had been in already but insisted it was placed on my forehead not my arm. She obliged with a look that said bloody stupid farang. I was in football mode now, I didn’t care.
15 minutes to go, stadium less than half full, atmosphere very flat except where we were. Packed with noisy Chonburi fans, flags, horns and screaming girls. About a thousand of them. Fans that is not girls. The webmaster and wife - resplendent in their party clothes - joined Brian, myself and partner and we settled down for an exciting match between two teams both coming off defeats who should be eager to win.
A lovely afternoon and early evening spent having the ‘football experience’ ruined by only one thing. The football. It was absolutely awful. Both teams. At half time I went out to see if a policeman would lend me his gun to shoot myself. Before the match Russ and I had discussed that football was after all entertainment. So what was this I wondered?
Can’t really comment on the ‘D’ word it wasn’t needed (by either team). Creativity…John Prescott on a bad day. Consistency…something resembling lumpy custard. Ah but we must remember standards are improving. I had watched Ratchaburi against BG the night before and whilst the ‘D’ was as usual appalling and the goalkeeping at times resembling something from Billy Smart's Circus it was entertaining, but this?
It took Chonburi half an hour against a very poor Swatcat to raise a meaningful effort on goal. Dos Santos was commanding with his play but he had little to stop and there was a little midfielder whose name I don’t know doing a lot of work. In the second half Chonburi began to threaten but every time the ball was in a promising wide position the cross was terrible. Couple of shots from wide on the left and a few scrambles in the box and that was it.
10 minutes to go I’d had enough. Said my goodbye’s and left. I was amazed how many others had done the same. Just sitting outside with bemused expressions. The Chonburi fans, still inside shouting, flag waving, girls still screaming, guy still shouting through a megaphone but not actually watching the match. That was NOT 200 baht’s worth each. In fact if it was free I don’t think it would be worth it. My partner, a Swatcat fan, looked at me in the car and said she didn’t want to go there again, it was boring and rubbish. A nice football day, great as it was, ruined by the football. Something wrong here. I hope the leaning tower of Pisa pick up made it home.
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