Interview With Masahiro Wada*: 2014

TPL

Chonburi 3-3 Ratchaburi

Chonburi Stadium

Attendance: 6,406

Saturday 15th March, 2014

EXCLUSIVE POST MATCH INTERVIEW WITH MASAHIRO WADA
(Channeled through my fevered imagination*)

Q - Do you consider that to be two points dropped or a point gained?
A - I think it is both. Three points are the most you can gain so in that respect it is two points dropped. However, if you lose you get no points. Today we got one point, which is one more than nothing so it is also one point gained.


Q - Why do you persist with Korakot at left back? He is clearly out of his depth at this level.
A - I am obliged to pick him because I believe he washes the chairman's car every Monday. He also does a few other odd jobs around the place - sweeping the changing room and watering the plants in the front office etc - therefore, he has earned his place.


Q - The defence looked particulary vulnerable yesterday. What plans do you have to deal with it?
A - We have arranged two friendly matches during the week. In the first one I will play eleven strikers and go all out on the attack and in the second one, I will pick eleven defenders and instruct them not to pass the halfway line.


Q - Dos Santos has been our best player so far this season, why didn't he play yesterday?
A - He is injured.


Q - So why was he sitting on the bench in his full kit?
A - I told him to come to the ground in his kit. If he'd been wearing his own clothes, the club would have charged him for a ticket. This way, he got in for free and had a close up view of the match.


Q - When Therdsak came on, he had a big influence on the game. Why wasn't he on from the start?
A - Ah, Therdsak. The veteran. The wily old fox. The little rascal. The midfield maestro. The professional's professional. The man with the engine. The string puller.  The motivator. The genius. The legend. The Crafty Cockney. Sorry, what was the question again?


Q - I thought Kushida was disappointing again yesterday. What is the Japanese for "get stuck in"?
A - The Japanese for "get stuck in" is very similar to the Japanese for "wander about aimlessly in midfield and make only short passes either sideways or backwards" so I can see why he might be having difficulty following my instructions. I'll have another word with him in the week.


Q - What was your biggest disappointment yesterday?
A - The fact that the matchday programmes didn't arrive before kick off. I had written a lovely article about player motivation and now no-one will get to read it. A real shame.


Q - And your highlight?
A - The fact that it didn't rain. It had been threatening all day - and we had a few rumbles of thunder - but thankfully, it held off. I had left my big coat at home and I would have got drenched!


Q - What did you think of the crowd yesterday?
A - I thought they were great. They really got behind the team. However, I was slightly disappointed to hear some effing and jeffing from some of the foreign fans who sit behind the dugout. Still, as long as it's not directed at me, I can live with it.


Q - Thank you.
A - You're welcome.


*In other words - I've made it up!