Face Masks
We are pleased to announce that our exclusive Bang Na Blue Pipes face masks are now available to buy. The coverings - which are in club colours and include a "blue pipe" snorkel to aid breathing (particularly useful to our bespectacled fans) - are on sale in the club shop, priced THB199. For those of you who don't live in the area, we are hoping to have them in our online store soon, but don't hold your breath...
New Signings
Khun Nat has splashed the cash and bought three new players - two goalkeepers and another goalkeeper - from 4th Division Ukranian league team, сині труби. The chairwoman has sent a private tuktuk to collect the trio, and they are expected to arrive in Thailand sometime in January, 2021, when they will go into three months of state quarantine at an unnamed location. Welcome, boys!
The Screen Queen
In a display of unprecedented benevolence, club chairwoman Nong Nat, aka "The Fit One That Married That Fat Guy", has paid THB16,000,001 to supply free feeds of Pornhub to the big screens at all TPL grounds for the rest of the season, as pre match and half time entertainment - and every time there is an "injury" break. She is also in talks to get the renowned adult movie channel to takeover from True Visions and broadcast all Thai league fixtures around the world, thus exposing the local game to a global audience of millions (mainly middle aged blokes who still live with their parents).
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